My name is Camila. I’m 23 years old and am from Bogotá, Columbia. Perhaps while reading this you’re asking yourself, “Why is someone like her from a different country going to Ecuador for an adventure like this?” For this reason I’m going to explain a little bit about my past month at El Refugio and what took place before coming here. My adventure started a little over two months ago. I share this first part to contextualize a bit and to give some background to the many reasons why I’m here.
Two months ago I hadn’t even thought about coming here, but God already had everything planned out, including the fact that He had been preparing me to make this decision. Right after I finished my University degree in Columbia I started to experience something called ‘Tinnitus.’ In layman’s terms, Tinnitus is a constant humming or ringing in one or both ears, 24 hours a day.
After various doctor’s appointments without an answer, my emotional, physical, and spiritual life was deteriorating. Nights were a constant nightmare, as I couldn’t sleep due to the noise in my ears. Episodes of anxiety became frequent. All of this caused me to confront my faith in a way that I had never experienced— I felt that my prayers simply weren’t being answered. Additionally, I had just finished several stages in my life: graduating from college, finishing my practicums, and on a personal level I had gone through a process of reevaluating the church, friendships, as well as family and other relationships.
Having spent a lot of time looking for answers from doctors, psychologists, friends, leaders from the church and others in my life, on Monday, September 7th I talked with Sara, a dear friend who also came here to El Refugio and lived her adventure. She told me that the next internship was starting on September 11th. Not having much hope of coming with such little time before it started, I requested more information about the internship. And as God works (always perfectly) on Tuesday I bought my plane tickets for September 11th to come here, living an adventure that had just begun.
From the day that I got on the airplane until today I have felt how God has been working in my life; the simple fact that I’m here has shown me God’s faithfulness and the answer to many long nights of prayer. The people that I have gotten to know have been nothing short of an incredible gift from God— love and care have not been lacking. Ryan and Erica, my ‘house parents,’ are incredibly wonderful people. I don’t fear trusting in them, as to this very day they have always concerned themselves with me, taking care of me and tending to my well-being. I’m an only child— but now I have six adopted brothers and sisters: Emily, Naty, Josué, Betsy, Jhonatan and Tagghert; people that in such a short amount of time already have an immense place in my heart.
I should mention that I am from a big city. So, I have never hiked up mountains, nor have I been immersed in nature. On the contrary, I’m used to cars, noise, people, asphalt, cement, etc. Therefore, the simple fact that I’m living in the midst of nature speaks to the the fact that I have totally left my comfort zone.
Alturas Interns 2015 with Staff Couples Coryells and Villarreals
In spite of this, my heart has been open to give 110%, even if that means hiking to the topmost point of the El Refugio property. I should say that contrary to everything I had thought, I have obtained these things in addition to many other things that in my life I had never imagined trying. God has shown me so much love in this month, that I can say with complete confidence that the wind, the trees, the sun, even the cold all speak of God’s greatness and perfection— how creative and what a great artist He is. What a privilege to be able to affirm that even I am one of His works of art.
I came here looking for answers from God regarding my life. I have found some and I know that I am going to find others along the path as I continue walking forward here at Hacienda El Refugio. In regards to the anxiety attacks, they have gone from frequent to almost none at all. The buzzing in my ears has continued, but I have been able to sleep as I once was able to. I have been able to see that God uses great deserts to show us things that we never imagined. I was convinced of this as I started my adventure here and for the second time read the following verse:
Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her.” Hosea 2:14
I thank God for my desert, for bringing me here, for the people I’ve been able to meet, and the way that He has spoken to me through them. I’m completely convinced that in spite of the difficulty, the fatigue and physical pain, including when reason fought with faith— God has everything planned. His ways are so much higher than mine and His thoughts go far beyond those that my mind could create. Nothing escapes Him. He has brought me to this point and I know that He will still take me much further still.
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